I am yet another addict, seeking your help - for the sake of both me and my beautiful wife, Elaine. I am a huge fan of your "Dear Wowhead" section, and have recently gathered my courage to write to you, seeing that you have already helped people like me - Black Rosee
, being two examples.
It is more than embarrassing to say, but I am addicted to...cheese.
Yes, cheese, is that a problem?!
...I am sorry for my temper, but it took me almost quarter of an hour to compose this part of the letter, and that has been a painful cheese-less quarter of an hour. As I was, saying, I am addicted to cheese. Groviera di Darnassus
, Fontina di Dalaran
, Toma Speziata alla Cipolla
, Primo Sale Nanico
, Brie di Roccavento
, Provola Stagionata
, Emmental d'Alterac
, and even the exotic alien Fontina di Garadar
, which I hear is made in the very homeland of the orcs! And with the recent activity in Northrend and Lucian's (my son) extremely successful business in Dalaran (although I hear people are stealing his wine and cheese...), I have been exposed to even more kinds of cheese - Caprino Stagionato
, Pecorino Salmastro
, and the illegally tasty Fontina Stagionata di Dalaran
! Light, I'd swim in the Molten Core and take showers in Wintergrasp just for a tiny bit of Dalaran Sharp, aged to perfection...
Ahem...you see what my problem is. I used to be the head of Stormwind's assassin's guild, rogue guild, SI:7, secret police and spy network. I was the man everybody would tremble before when hearing his name...that is, if I wasn't so subtle that they didn't know that my name was associated with all those things. But I am going off on tangents again! See what cheese has done to me? See?!
This is my story, Wowhead. I really hope you can cure me and my wife from this nightmare. It has consumed my life - it started off as a mild passion, and then... I became this
! Even as I write those last words, I can smell the sweet aroma of cheese from the kitchen. I am sorry, I can no longer control myself, I need to go there now
Thanks in advance.E. Trias